Falling Away

It's morning and I am baking cinnamon rolls. Don't be impressed -- they're store bought. It is freezing in my house. This cup of hot tea has a funny taste to it. It's Saturday, post-holiday, post-Black Friday, post-anything visually exciting. Charles has, in his dedicated fashion, updated his blog with beautiful photographs of his family from Thanksgiving. I brought my camera to his house; unfortunately, I didn't take photos of his family members... just quiet little corners of his heavily-decorated home. But, I haven't come here today to post those as they idly reside in my camera. Instead, I will post some photos I took while fall was still technically fall in Athens, though everything looks cold and dead and drab, welcoming a thick layer of snow. I am comforted, sitting in my kitchen in the early hours of the day. I'd rather not venture out into the world to complete tasks and things.

These photos were taken at Stroud's Run for the annual Dawn 2 Dusk project... they weren't published in the paper, unfortunately. Since I was the only commercial shooter who contributed to the project (and not that my shots were "commercial," but anyway), I was a little disappointed. I guess a few other folks got all landscapey for the shoot, so mine were sort of overlooked. Also, I don't think that the tilt shift really translates that well on print.

Fall seems like a distant memory on this chilly, wintery morning.

St-St-Studio

I am behind on blogging. I have shot four assignments since my last update, two of which were in the studio. The first two images are for a mock Z!NK magazine cover. The latter two are for a mock ad campaign for The Gap.

Now, if you know me at all, you know that that studio presents an array of dilemmas for me. I feel like all of the equipment and technology act as a barrier between me and an idea. I am uncomfortable manipulating light, mostly because I've never really been properly shown how... but, I guess, most people just figure it out for themselves. So, I have been trying to figure it out for myself. It has been frustrating, but it's necessary. Over the summer, it didn't help much that I interned with a photographer who had much the same philosophy on light that I do. I am trying my best to overcome my fears in photography. Of course, Photoshop helps out whenever I make a tiny flub-up. Heh. Flub-up is a funny expression.

I'm Only Sleeping

Most of the time, I hurry through my assignments for work. I am the photographer for the School of Health and Human Services, and most of what I have to shoot is completely foreign to me since I am used to directing pretty people in pretty clothes and pretty environments. For work, I point the camera and push down the shutter and it's almost mindless. And I am disappointed in myself for not having this gift of being able to make the most of every photographic situation. I am timid, yes... and maybe too painfully uninterested in every day life for my own good.

But every now and then I walk away with an image or two that I like for whatever reason.

I am finding it more and more difficult to identify myself as any sort of photographer these days. I would say my strength is in taking photos that don't have any universal significance... they don't help you see the truth, and they don't reveal the ugly or the beautiful or the obscure. And maybe I am just this aimless thing walking around with a camera and the utmost particularity.

Maybe I am too obsessed with an ideal and a fantasy.

Gimme Shelter

These images were shot for a mock-up article in TIME on the housing crisis in America (a class assignment in which students choose an issue, a publication, and a means of illustrating the issue). I had a blast with the shoot, but it was a lot of physical labor carrying household furnishings into fields and in and out of the woods. Luckily, all of the furniture was donated/came from my home, and I had Charles and his mighty manpower to assist me in all the carrying and car loading. My poor little Sundance barely made it to Stroud's Run and back, but that's another story for another day -- and the general theme of my life, don'tcha know.

The tilt-shift lens makes me drool, but the price makes me cry. It is so expensive to be a photographer, and I have been poor my entire life, even more so now that I am trying to maintain a portfolio, promote myself, and look for work in metropolitan areas. I just have my little 5D, my 50mm, Holga, Polaroid, and a few studio-oriented odds and ends. I have never been of the impression that the gear makes the photographer, but I am extremely insecure about my financial resources in this field. I look for a light every day, and I hope the gods are kind to me when I leave the "ivory tower" of Ohio University.

In other news, I need to stop staying up past my bedtime.

Park Here

There are several photos I'd love to share, particularly of new class work, but the Lord's truth is that I'm just too lazy for my own good. I am unmotivated to organize and edit new photos. I am unmotivated to work on my portfolio web site. I am unmotivated to study for a mid-term, or to drink my cup of hot tea, to put on my pajamas, or to wash my face for bed. But, here is a glimpse, just to fill up some time and space, as I observe my boyfriend next to me, faithfully updating his blog with fresh new eye candy.

Dedicated Follower of Fashion

Three weeks of class have flown by and I don't want to jinx myself, but I am rather pleased with my images thus far. It's so surreal to be a senior... to be in my capstone classes (is that even the proper term?)... and, for once, to actually have some sort of "concrete" vision for how I want my photography to look and feel. The second image was for my self-promo... I designed my own flower packet and put sunflower seeds inside. The front of the packet was the image above, and the back had all of my contact information, etc. along with the words "here comes the sun." I suppose you can't really get the full effect without holding the promo in your hand, but take my word for it -- it is awesome. Not to toot my own horn. But toot toot.

I think I'll be focusing on fashion for the majority of the year. Not that I actually know much about fashion. In the end, guess I just like taking pictures of pretty people.

Tea Time

A glimpse of an update, and a sorry one at that, but my head has been around the block and back for the past few weeks. I'm back in Athens, taking photos of Charles in various rooms of my new house and scurrying off to classes and meetings and other whereabouts at all hours of the day, trying to remember the various tasks I've compiled into sticky notes. Not enough time to sleep and listen to good music. I drink a lot of tea and worry about my future. Despite the concerns, life is good and Athens is beautiful.