Friday, January 22, 2010
I took an independent study this quarter to work on a personal project. Basically, I wanted to do strictly portraits as my portfolio is seriously lacking in this field. And I wanted the portraits to be of female students who are involved in creative fields -- some that I know, some that I don't know. I sort of started this project last spring in VICO 324, but I only walked away from that class with a few images that I still like. I am photographing in both digital and film formats... it feels nice to have the freedom to shoot film without the pressure of a deadline looming over my head.
I suppose there is something I want to say about being a young woman in a field that forces out of you a certain amount of personality. I haven't found the words yet. Maybe I can gather my thoughts after all the photos are taken.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
I barely picked up my camera during the holiday break, but I did shoot my first-ever wedding on December 19th for the Shifleys. Here are a few of my favorite photos.
It was a small wedding and very casual. It was also partly a favor for a long-time friend of mine. I was very nervous for the day, feeling unprepared and inadequate with my experience level and my gear. Not only have I never shot a wedding before, but I am not much of an event photographer. Likewise, I didn't have access to strobes or lights, and I only had my 50mm lens. I felt very uncomfortable at first... and I will be the first to admit that I wish I would've gotten closer to capture more moments. However, I am proud of myself for rising to the challenge to photograph something outside of my comfort level.
Overall, it was sort of a heartwarming day on a personal level. As I edited through the photographs, I noticed that I took more pictures of Ellen, naturally, since she was the bride. But in several of the photos, she is alone. I cannot say that this was intentional on my part, though Greg was always running off somewhere, and Ellen was right where all the action was most of the time. I suppose my edits sort of say something about my feelings, though. After enduring the good and the bad of human relationships, both romantic and non, it has often difficult for me to pick myself back up and welcome new love into my life. I seem to be at such a tender place in my life that these relationships, and their undoings, have had a profound effect on me.
Naturally, along with the happiness of a new relationship comes an overwhelming sense panic. I think a wedding is an easy place to identity all of these strong sentiments... the nervous rush to get things in order, to get dressed, to get the kids ready... and underneath it all, the shock that the day has arrived. Obviously, I have never been married. But, as I find myself months away from graduation, in a serious relationship, I am confronted with strong feelings of panic. Then again, life is short. I suppose we all need a day to just stand back and relax... to welcome the blessings, the new gifts life has given us, and to enjoy the occasional piece of cake.